How To Break Up With a Wedding Vendor Without Bad Blood!
BY The WMG Bride | 28 Nov, 2015 | 1686 views | 6 min read
There is no better and brighter day in one's life than the wedding day. Everything is meant to be absolutely perfect on this day and hence there is so much planning that goes in during the months running up to the wedding. It is during these months of planning that things get dim and the stress sets in.
The photographer who seemed like the most perfect choice to cover your big day seems pricey, the most stunning designer lehenga doesn't come through as visioned, the decor pieces aren't even close to what you imagine and your make up artist seems bored by the looks you suggested.
There is no reason to worry. Your emotions are high and there can be melt-downs but sometimes it is not just you. Each vendor relationship is entered with the most excitement and enthusiasm but things don’t go as planned. With all the planning you will realize you may don’t mesh well, your partnership is not helping or you have found another vendor for a better price. Whatever the reason, breaking up with a vendor isn’t easy. Here are some things to help you break up gracefully and ensure there isn’t much bad blood:
1. Read your contract: All vendors, from florists to photographers insist on a contract. So before you say anything to the vendor go through the contract. You will find the details of termination and process to proceed. You want to know these details before you call to cancel. Don't just drop anyone or get ghosting (not reply to messages, calls etc) - know your rights before you do anything!
2. Request for a full deposit refund, but understand their situation as well: We understand weddings are expensive and every rupee matters but these vendors work on an event basis. They probably turned down offers to accommodate you. So ask them if they can give you a partial return of the deposit or return the full deposit incase they get another appointment for the same dates. If they refuse, send them a polite mail and if it gets worse, just put it up on their social media. But cover your bases, before you do so.
3. Don’t get personal: Break ups are not easy, not even with your vendors. There is going to be a little heat and stress. Do not let that get to you and start a blame game. Be polite and respectful. After all who wants bad vibes close to the wedding. So tell them you are not happy with it, firm but not rude. Tell them it is hard for you recco them to someone when things haven't gone as planned.
4. Give feedback: If you are convinced that a certain aspect was lacking give your vendor constructive criticism. There is a knack to it, explain your expectation and how it was not met. Be open to receiving some criticism too. Over all, this will help you get something off your chest and hopefully will help your vendor learn.
5. Don’t become a ghost: We hear a lot of vendors complain about this. Please confront the situation, don’t run away from it. It is never ok to disappear on anyone and leave them hanging. If you don’t think you can break up over a call or meeting, just text or email them.
6. Make a list and get them done: Make a list of things that are issues and deal with them head-on. The best thing about trying to break up is to give them issues on a platter and let them deal with it. Forget the criticism, give them "things to do" and get them done. If you definitely don't want anything done, let them end it well so get whatever you have left, done and dusted. Be a professional even if they are not!
7. Don't use social media recklessly: Yes it's the easiest thing to lash out and write crap on their wall and put it up on your Facebook page for all to see but weigh the outcome and your criticism before hand. I remember this woman who ranted about how expensive a vendor is - seriously and honestly, you chose them despite the price and now you can't blame them for it. Know what you can blame and what to avoid. In the end, you don't want to look like a fool.
8. Accept the apology: If they say sorry, accept it gracefully. Tell them to finish well and wish them good luck. If they don't apologise, let them know that they need to give you an apology.
9. Write a review about them on WedMeGood: If a vendor has behaved professionally and gracefully , go ahead and put your experience down in a review on WedMeGood (Reviews matter a HUGE deal on WMG). The same way, instead of getting into a cussing match with a vendor who has behaved unprofessionally, just go ahead and drop in a review about them on their profile on WedMeGood. It usually makes them sit up and take notice, and resolve any outstanding issues. It also helps future couples read about your experiences before booking them.
There is no reason to worry. Your emotions are high and there can be melt-downs but sometimes it is not just you. Each vendor relationship is entered with the most excitement and enthusiasm but things don’t go as planned. With all the planning you will realize you may don’t mesh well, your partnership is not helping or you have found another vendor for a better price. Whatever the reason, breaking up with a vendor isn’t easy. Here are some things to help you break up gracefully and ensure there isn’t much bad blood:
1. Read your contract: All vendors, from florists to photographers insist on a contract. So before you say anything to the vendor go through the contract. You will find the details of termination and process to proceed. You want to know these details before you call to cancel. Don't just drop anyone or get ghosting (not reply to messages, calls etc) - know your rights before you do anything!
2. Request for a full deposit refund, but understand their situation as well: We understand weddings are expensive and every rupee matters but these vendors work on an event basis. They probably turned down offers to accommodate you. So ask them if they can give you a partial return of the deposit or return the full deposit incase they get another appointment for the same dates. If they refuse, send them a polite mail and if it gets worse, just put it up on their social media. But cover your bases, before you do so.
3. Don’t get personal: Break ups are not easy, not even with your vendors. There is going to be a little heat and stress. Do not let that get to you and start a blame game. Be polite and respectful. After all who wants bad vibes close to the wedding. So tell them you are not happy with it, firm but not rude. Tell them it is hard for you recco them to someone when things haven't gone as planned.
4. Give feedback: If you are convinced that a certain aspect was lacking give your vendor constructive criticism. There is a knack to it, explain your expectation and how it was not met. Be open to receiving some criticism too. Over all, this will help you get something off your chest and hopefully will help your vendor learn.
5. Don’t become a ghost: We hear a lot of vendors complain about this. Please confront the situation, don’t run away from it. It is never ok to disappear on anyone and leave them hanging. If you don’t think you can break up over a call or meeting, just text or email them.
6. Make a list and get them done: Make a list of things that are issues and deal with them head-on. The best thing about trying to break up is to give them issues on a platter and let them deal with it. Forget the criticism, give them "things to do" and get them done. If you definitely don't want anything done, let them end it well so get whatever you have left, done and dusted. Be a professional even if they are not!
7. Don't use social media recklessly: Yes it's the easiest thing to lash out and write crap on their wall and put it up on your Facebook page for all to see but weigh the outcome and your criticism before hand. I remember this woman who ranted about how expensive a vendor is - seriously and honestly, you chose them despite the price and now you can't blame them for it. Know what you can blame and what to avoid. In the end, you don't want to look like a fool.
8. Accept the apology: If they say sorry, accept it gracefully. Tell them to finish well and wish them good luck. If they don't apologise, let them know that they need to give you an apology.
9. Write a review about them on WedMeGood: If a vendor has behaved professionally and gracefully , go ahead and put your experience down in a review on WedMeGood (Reviews matter a HUGE deal on WMG). The same way, instead of getting into a cussing match with a vendor who has behaved unprofessionally, just go ahead and drop in a review about them on their profile on WedMeGood. It usually makes them sit up and take notice, and resolve any outstanding issues. It also helps future couples read about your experiences before booking them.
Picture Courtesy: Avneet & Parvinder's Wedding
Whatever it is, just let them know. If you do decide to break up over email here is a template: Dear xxxxxx, Thank you for taking the time to meet / talk to me. It was a pleasure to discuss the wedding ideas with you; however, we have decided to go with another …………….. as ………………. ( insert vendor type. Eg: Photographer / Makeup artist and the reason). The contract says I am entitled to a partial sum of the deposit money for cancelling 6 weeks in advance. Please let me know the details of how that works. I think we have different ideas on this wedding and I don't want us to waste anymore of each other's time. I'm sure you will do very well - I am just looking for something else and I hope you understand. I wish you the best of luck of luck in the future and thank you again for your time. Best, xxxxxxxxx Breaking up with a vendor can be done gracefully. Have you broken up with a vendor? Tell us how you did it. Written by Krupa Kumar Krupa is digital media enthusiast and blogger based in California. She is currently setting up the digital wing of Oysters Advertising. She draws inspiration from people, places, and pretty things. Krupa loves weddings and also writes about digital media, fashion and lifetsyle.She blogs at http://thepiedpiperess.com
